Meeting a woman that you naturally build chemistry with is not purely by luck. You can improve your chances of meeting a woman you’ll naturally blend with. However, how to meet women is the burning question.
It can be frustrating when you match with hundreds of women with no date to show for it. Online dating has revolutionized dating as we knew it. You can hook up with a handful of women from all over the world that are looking for a guy like you.
Nevertheless, not everyone is glowing in the glory of online dating. It’s still challenging for most guys to attract and score girls they meet online.
Tinder is one of the user-friendly and most popular online dating platforms. In this blog, we’ll explore what to say to a girl on Tinder that will improve your odds. You’ll see some of the foolproof strategies that successful guys use on Tinder to score dates.
(If you go to a party you need to be able to grab her attention: how to get a girls attention).
Another aspect that makes meeting girls at a private party interesting, is the image it portrays of you. There’s something exclusive about guys that are invited to a private party that impresses women in the party. Women are attracted to guys that seem to be the leaders in their fields, the alphas.
1. Make the first move.
When you swipe right and you’ve found your match, waiting for her to reach out is a long shot. Girls can attention to guys that show interest in them. Although sometimes the attention might not last you’ll attract it at the initial stages of your interaction.
Approaching a girl reveals subtle qualities that girls desire in men such as confidence, passion, and leadership. Making the first moves gives you a blank page to work with. You can start the conversation from whichever point you feel comfortable with and structure it to fit your desires.
It’s much simpler to score a girl that you have a lot in common with. Furthermore, when you are extremely good at something, it triggers curiosity in people about your ability.
Remember, that on Tinder or any other online dating platform, beautiful girls get an overwhelming number of prospects. So, how you make your first move is crucial.
A technical first move will trigger a girl’s curiosity and interest all while inspiring trust. When you show you are thirsty with your first move, no matter how intriguing you are the girl will avoid you.
2. Read the girl’s dating profile.
What to say to a girl on Tinder depends on what you know about her. Most guys look at the girl’s pic to see how hot she is. Realizing that everything in her profile is a conversation starter can give you a wide variety of things to talk about.
When you are designing your first move, first try and understand the girl that you have approached. You already have a sneak peek at her from her dating bio. That puts you in a position of power to strike a memorable and interesting conversation.
(I’d highly advise you read this article for more tips: How to flirt with a girl at the grocery store).
For example, her dating bio says that she’s an adrenaline junkie.
You: What would be your poison, gliding the Burj Khalifa or climbing Mount Everest? (You’ve started a conversation from her point of interest and sort her opinion.)
3. Build an emotional connection
You can become very persuasive when you know how to appeal to a girl’s emotional side. What you say to a girl on Tinder has to trigger and facilitate an emotional connection.
Sending a message that the woman can relate to can foster emotional connection. Conversations run out because either has something to say. Telling the girl about yourself can give the girl something to ask..
One of the reasons that most guys find it challenging scoring a girl online is because of generic messages. Talking to a girl like you are talking to Siri makes it very challenging for the girl to be an enthusiast and engaged in the conversation.
Her: I enjoy painting and dancing.
Generic Text: That’s nice. You look like a fun person to be around. (Typical texts used to impress a girl that you like everything about her to score her.)
You: Awesome! I find painting to be very fascinating with how it expresses a dream or emotion. Do you do a particular type of painting?
4. Highlight what you have in common
Another way of figuring out what to say to a girl on Tinder is highlighting what you have in common. When you meet a girl on Tinder, she’ll approach you with doubt until you qualify.
Nevertheless, people with similar characters find it easy to interact with each other. Highlighting what you have in common makes the conversation easy for the girl to engage in.
(Here’s another incredibly useful article for you to read: How to attract a girl from work without coming on too strong).
The girl you are talking to will be more comfortable the easier they find it is talking to you. That will inspire trust which is a crucial ingredient to scoring girls on Tinder.
Highlighting what you have in common can be a sneaky way of trying to understand the person. You’ll initiate a conversation that will also show you what you don’t have in common. You’ll be able to structure your conversation on what to say to her.
5. Ask the relevant questions
Girls are everywhere and the truth is you meet them all the time. However, meeting a woman might not necessarily make it a good idea to approach her. Being aware of your environment and knowing how to spot an opportunity to engage a woman is the best way to meet women.
The best way to understand a girl you’ve met on Tinder is showing interest in different aspects of her life. Asking a girl relevant questions shows your interest in her.
One crucial aspect to consider when you are asking a girl a question is your level of trust and comfort. Some guys freak girls out from the start with the type of questions they ask. For instance
What’s your body count?
Why did you break up with your ex?
Do you want kids and marriage?
Asking questions that require intimate information about someone is best done in person. You need other forms of communication to have a clear and effective chat. When it comes to talking to girls on Tinder, keeping it light can play in your favor.
6. Seek her advice
Women want to be seen beyond what meets the eye. Women perceive that guys that are attracted to their physical attributes are motivated by lust.
Soliciting a woman’s advice about something when chatting indicates that you appreciate her intelligence in the matter. The girl will be motivated to talk to you because she’ll feel heard and important.
The trick about soliciting advice is structuring it in a way that will highlight the things you have in common. When a woman gives you advice and she finds that you share the same belief, it can foster trust and strong connections.
You: I’m looking for a movie to watch. Which genre do you recommend?
Her: I like comedy. (She has told you something about herself)
You: I enjoy the comedy. But I want something with more adrenaline rush. (You’ve shown similar interest and also inspired mystery because you are into something else that she’s not yet aware of.)
(Yet another valuable article for you to read on online dating: How to start a conversation on tinder).
Some dating apps match you with girls with similar interests. When you have something in common, it creates the base for you to explore more about the girl and score her.
You have a few minutes to impress the girl you want when you finally meet her. A sleek approach and a smooth buildup can help you score the girl. Here are some tips to hack it when you meet a girl you want:
7. Recap on something she told you
Most guys wonder what to say to a girl on Tinder is because they want to impress the girl. Now, there are sneaky ways you can impress a girl and maintain your position of power in the conversation.
(Sharpen your flirting and conversation skills with this article: How do you flirt with a girl).
Recapping what a girl told you about herself is an indication that you listen. That can also be used to determine your level of interest which at this point you are acing everything.
Recap is a conversation hook technique that can help you keep the conversation going and also know more about a person in that regard.
8. Challenge her intelligence or belief
When you are a master of communication, you can use controversy to your advantage. Most people have a strong emotional attachment to their beliefs, values, and interests.
Starting a conversation that might challenge these areas of a person’s life can trigger an argument that can expose vulnerability to the person.
For example, talking to a girl that considers herself a feminist. Challenging her beliefs can make her come guns blazing with facts and emotions.
The trick to this technique is to challenge her belief or intelligence so that you can validate it. The point is not to show her that she’s wrong. You want her to see that what she beliefs in makes sense and it’s smart.
9. The future talk
It’s crucial that you be swift and tactful when talking to a girl on Tinder. You’ll be texting her at the same time with the other five guys that are making her laugh her lungs out.
(Improve on your seduction skills with this awesome article: How to Seduce a Woman).
Talking to a girl in a way that inspires physical meeting is important if you want to score the girl. Engaging her in talks about the future can give her imagination something to play around with.
If you know what a girl likes, you can use it as an opportunity to get a date with her. Nevertheless, engaging a woman in what you have in common and looking at it from a future perspective is a great way to inspire a woman to want to see you.
10. Share something about yourself
The big elephant in the room when you are talking to a girl on Tinder is trust. It’s true that both of you are looking for someone. But everyone is skeptical about the other person because at the back of their mind they know that they might not be the only ones.
Saying something that inspires trust during your conversations can build an actual connection. I always advise that guys make the first move because it gives you control.
Share with a girl something intimate about yourself that will make her feel like she knows you. Building familiarity also builds trust. You’ll find that your conversations become easy with time because the girl is also sharing stuff about herself.
What to say to a woman on Tinder can be challenging if your main purpose from the start is to impress her. You’ll create a lot of limitations to yourself on the things you can explore about the girl which will guarantee you running out of things to say.
Approach a girl from a neutral point and explore the known as you systematically branch into the unknown. Women are not complex once you understand their communication patterns and love languages.
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Iain Myles is an internationally recognised dating coach and co-owner of the UK’s largest dating coaching company, Kamalifestyles. Iain is also an internet sensation thanks to the multiple viral videos posted through the YouTube channel KamaTV, which has grossed over 100 million views.
Iain has appeared in numerous newspaper columns and radio shows across the world. He is a regular contributor to BBC Radio in the UK.