Women are unpredictable, while they are seen as natural talkers, sometimes they choose to let you have the upper hand of owning the interaction.
The last thing you want is boring her to a point that she leaves you. That leaves you with the pressure and anxiety of being the architect of the conversation.
Nevertheless, not everyone has a silver tongue that will make a girl’s mind twist and swirl with excitement.
In this blog, we’ll explore the best ways on how to keep a conversation going with a girl.
The deciding factor is to come up with interesting things to talk about that won’t leave you running out of ideas.
1. Start a conversation right
There is nothing that keeps a girl more interested than a guy who uses the right language while talking to her. Keeping a girl interested takes effort and a good start to the conversation. The first impression is critical when starting a conversation.
For instance, if you spot a girl across the room and like her, think of what you’ll say to her to strike on a conversation. It is important to create a room that allows her to contribute.
(Do you want to know how to approach a cold? Read this: How to approach a girl).
There are several tips to consider in striking a conversation keeping it going;
- Pay her a compliment. Tell her how beautiful her eyes are or the outfit she’s wearing, she’ll feel good and be interested in talking with you more. Girls are more likely to engage with men who express their thoughts freely. However, you might want to consider not complimenting her body to avoid coming off as a predator.
- Offer her a recommendation. You see this beautiful girl at your favorite movie place or book store, it would pay off if you recommend her to watch or read a certain movie or book that you consider interesting.
- Ask her for a favor. A man that is capable of asking for help from a lady comes off as sexy and respectful. A girl will feel the need to talk to you more if you show that you can trust her.
2. Use open-ended questions
You want to open a conversation that makes her interested, gets her thinking, and smiling at the same time. Avoid yes or no questions; they leave nothing to debate on. Ask her questions that can generate more questions.
You want a balanced conversation so don’t make it look like she’s in an interview. Provide your perspectives in the question so she can also learn your thoughts. A two-way conversation is engaging, fun, and goes on and on.
(Here’s a great article for you on dating apps: How to get more matches on tinder).
If you’re not sure of the right questions to ask her, explore questions she can easily contribute to.
- Ask about her day- there is likely to be something funny or interesting that happened to her during the day. Ask her about it and share your experiences too.
- Ask for advice. Don’t come off as an emotionless human, if you’re struggling with something, in particular, don’t be afraid to ask for advice.
3. Create a genuine interest
Creating a genuine interest in a girl can give you a lot to talk about. You’ll know and slightly understand parts of her life that can create an interesting conversation that can foster strong connections.
Most people develop an interest in people that are interested in them. Once she starts building her interest in you it becomes a love affair.
If the girl likes you, she’ll want to find out more about you. Take the chance to impress her with stories and aspects of your life she’s curious about.
4. Be yourself
Nothing comes off as attractive as a man who is himself. It is simple to say but hard to actualize since as humans, we are motivated by the thought of being like a certain person or looking in a certain way. Life and the need to win put so much influence on us that we end up creating a perfect picture of ourselves.
Not letting the influence steal away from you the true personality, skills, and gifts you own will make you win the girl. People who are true to themselves are confident and are not easily swayed by thoughts.
(If you’re thinking of expanding your social circle I’d recommend you read this: How to make female friends).
A real person can easily keep the conversation going since he brings up topics that portray their personality which comes off naturally. Being yourself helps you attract people who appreciate the real you.
It also helps you put full focus on things that are important and worry less about the perception people have of you. This reduces the pressures that come your way. After all, people should love you for you.
5. Keep the conversation light
Avoid bringing up controversial topics. Let the conversation be about knowing more about each other but in a fun way. You don’t want to bring up political topics.
Several tips to ensure a conversation remains light entails;
- Using a sense of humor. Do not be too serious, you might come off as boring. You should talk about things you can both laugh about. If it makes her uncomfortable or offensive, apologize and retract.
- Talk about funny things. A little bit of positive gossip will break the ice especially if it is in areas you both have an interest in like music. When you have an idea of what’s latest with celebrity news, music, or movies, you’ll always have something you can both talk about.
- Practice a funny event as a joke. Letting a girl know you can go out of your way to put a smile on her is a bonus. Making a joke out of a funny event will keep the conversation going on and on.
6. Focus on your body language
Let your body language speak for you. When a girl knows that you are paying keen attention to her talks, she’ll have more things to share. It is easy to know how interested a person is in you through body language, and be with her in the conversation.
(Another incredibly useful article for you: How to get a womans attention).
Consider sitting upright, wearing a smile, and great eye contact. These things assure her that you’re focused on her. You can also know how interested a girl is by;
- The way she uses her body. Does she smile while you’re talking? Are her eyes on you or does she keep looking at other things?
- Her eyes. They should also encourage you to keep the conversation going but if she constantly looks away, it might be the time to change the topic or ask politely what she’d rather want to talk about.
- How her legs and arms are put. Crossing them together might be a sign of lacking confidence and boredom
You’ll know how to keep a conversation going with a girl when you pay attention to her body language and nonverbal cues.
7. Ask for updates about things she’s talked about before
If this is not your first date, you should follow up on things she’s mentioned before. For instance, if she told you that she was applying for a job, it is necessary to ask her if she got invited for an interview.
It shows her how interested and concerned you’re with her life events; she will like you more for that. A girl that knows you care about her will appreciate you more and give you the desired audience.
Another way to go about this is by learning more about her interests. People love to talk about themselves especially when there is so much to talk about.
Ask her how she explores her interests, why she likes the things she likes, and why she has an opinion about something in the way she does. It will earn you endless information that will keep the conversation going on and on.
8. Make and brainstorm ideas
Coming up with ideas and going through them together is likely to keep a girl interested in talking to you. Through the process of building ideas and putting in the time to come up with a creative plan, you get to connect more.
(You absolutely NEED to read this: How to meet women).
Here are steps that can make the conversation more interesting while sharing ideas on fun plans;
- Have individual creative thoughts- let each person work on coming up with their ideas to see how creative they can be. Make it as competitive as possible to make it more fun.
- Analyze and pick the best suggestions- once you have identified individual thoughts, exchange and criticize each idea to eliminate that which doesn’t make sense.
- Be playful- the last thing you want to do is go through this process with a stone face. It should be a bonding and time to release some of the tension.
- Settle at a common decision-once you’ve agreed to disagree on the ideas, settle at a common ground and let it reflect both your interests to enjoy the plan.
9. Share your goals and aspirations
Talking about life ambitions is an interesting topic to consider while conversing. Let her know about your hopes and dreams in life. There is so much information you can give when talking about your goals.
Sharing this information is a good way to not only have something that keeps the conversation going but also to connect.
(Yet another highly useful article for you to read: How to tell a girl you like her).
Talk about your present achievements, where you see yourself in the next 5-10 years, and the plans in place to get you there. It is not a job interview; however, it should make you see things as far as being together is concerned.
10. Offer information about yourself
If you are wondering how to keep a conversation going with a girl, you are the cheat code. While you’re directing the open-ended questions on the girl, remember that a conversation happens between two people. It is not an interview session but a time to deeply know more about the other person and connect.
You can still achieve putting your focus on her and at the same time share personal information through the following means;
Telling her about the interests you share- if she shares something she enjoys doing with her free time that you also love, tell her. This shows that you’re attentive to her interests and she might even consider inviting you to enjoy yourself together.
Giving personal opinions from the questions you ask- as I said earlier, don’t treat the conversation as an interview that after her answer you move on to the next. Contribute your thoughts on the topics too and she’ll respect you for that.
How to keep a conversation going with a girl requires patience. Don’t be so quick to dismiss her if she doesn’t respond to you with the same energy you give her, instead, give her time to get comfortable around you.
Also, avoid going quiet on her, she might mistake it for lack of interest.
If she doesn’t find anything interesting to respond to, do not give up on bringing up topics to talk about. Probably one might strike her thoughts and get her going on and on.
However, if a girl proves adamant to have a conversation with you, don’t force her. You don’t want to come off as desperate or lacking options.
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Iain Myles is an internationally recognised dating coach and co-owner of the UK’s largest dating coaching company, Kamalifestyles. Iain is also an internet sensation thanks to the multiple viral videos posted through the YouTube channel KamaTV, which has grossed over 100 million views.
Iain has appeared in numerous newspaper columns and radio shows across the world. He is a regular contributor to BBC Radio in the UK.