When you’ve been in a relationship for a long time, it’s common to lose the spark that once made her girly when she looks at you. It is scary because even when you are not feeling the love, you still love the person.
The quarantine and lockdowns have forced couples to spend more time together than what they are used to. As much as it might have its advantages it can also pose a great challenge to the relationship.
Since you spend more time together and in the same place, you are likely to have more fights, arguments, which can drift you.
A new relationship is filled with energy and adrenaline because each person lives for the other. But as time goes the energy fades and the adrenaline disappears. Relationships reach a plateau phase when the couple is comfortable with each other.
The longer your relationship stays in the plateau phase the further apart you’ll drift. It’s a delicate phase because that’s where most couples lose attraction and the relationship becomes unstable. However, a plateau phase is not a death sentence to a relationship when discovered.
In this blog, we’ll look at how to fall back in love with a woman you desire.
You will get insights into individual and collective adjustments that you can make to bring back the fire in your relationship.
1. Take some time off.
Taking time off to reflect on the relationship can help you bring the magic back to your relationship. You spend a lot of time together with your partner and that can create a routine that can trigger boredom.
You are likely to think you are better off alone when you’ve stayed with a girl for long. Taking time off can give you an objective view of what the relationship means to you.
You’ll remember the reasons you wanted the relationship. And if you are looking for ways of how to fall in love, it means that you still have something that you love about the woman. Remembering why you fell in love can trigger the fire in the relationship again.
2. Start understanding your partner again.
Most couples assume they know each other. It’s natural to feel that way because you spend a good amount of time together. It’s easy for the familiarity to create that facade in a relationship.
But that assumption with time becomes dangerous because you’ll find that you know previous versions of your partner. Thinking that you know your partner when you really don’t can create a disconnect in the relationship. However, you can remedy the situation by understanding your partner again.
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Listening with an intention to understand your partner allows you to know how they feel about things. You’ll know their new dreams because of the passion they talk with. You’ll also understand their new deal breakers.
You’ll find flawless ways to emotionally reconnect with your partner when you understand them better. You’ll also be able to rekindle the fading flame.
3. Forgive your partner.
A lot happens along the way in a long-term relationship. However, it’s easy to keep score of all the wrong that has been done to you than the good you get. The feeling of being treated unfairly can create a disconnect and make you fall out of love.
You can easily misjudge everything your partner does when you are bitter with them. Forgiving your partner gives you a chance to love them again. You’ll start seeing the true intention behind the actions and maybe love them more.
However, talking to your partner about how you feel about their actions is equally important. Your partner is likely to get in your bad books again when you keep forgiving without communicating.
Understanding that beyond the loyalty and love that you expect from each other, you are both bound to make mistakes. It will help you not take every wrong turn personally and make it easy for you to forgive some things.
4. Redirect your attention to each other.
How to fall back in love is a common question in modern relationships. Most couples find themselves estranged after a while and they can’t pinpoint at what point it started. Most modern relationships are strained because couples lack quality time with each other.
Redirecting your attention to each other can reignite the flame in your relationship. You’ll pay more attention to each other. You’ll understand your partner and the things that make them feel special.
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Both men and women crave the attention of each other when in a relationship. Redirecting your attention to each other allows you to give each other a good amount of attention. It’s the small unspoken gestures in a relationship that makes someone feel valued and special.
5. Build a good communication system
Your tongue has the power to build your relationship to heights you’ve never imagined. Sometimes couples talk but never really communicate with each other. You’ll find that with time you are drifting apart.
Communication glues you to the same page as the relationship progresses. Rebuilding strong communication habits between you and your partner can rapidly grow the love in your relationship.
(I’d highly advise you read the following blog article: How to win a girls heart).
We change even when we are in a relationship. Communication allows you to keep up with the changes as they occur. You’ll know how you adjust to each other and find common grounds even with the changes that occur.
Make it a silent rule that you’ll not go to bed without having a quality conversation with your girl. You’ll not only understand how her day was, but you’ll also notice the subtle changes occurring in your girl’s preferences, interests, and values.
6. Engage in activities together.
It’s easy to fall into a routine when you’ve been in a relationship for a long time. Your relationship will become boring because you can predict everything that will happen in the day, week, or even month.
Eliminating routine from your relationship can trigger the passion that once existed. For example, try out an activity that your partner loves. Women feel special when their partners go out of their comfort zone for them.
For example, take that pastry class that your girl loves so much. Engaging yourself in an activity that she loves introduces new energy to your relationship. She’ll also want to try out something for you.
You’ll find that you are creating new connections as you engage each other in new activities.
7. Don’t put too much pressure.
You can enter panic mode when you realize that your relationship is hanging in the balance. However, panicking about the realization will not put you in a progressive place to find good ways of how to fall back in love. You’re likely to act out desperation to save or hold on to what’s left of your relationship.
When you realize that you need to work on your relationship, it’s best that you don’t take the pressure alone. A relationship grows when the couple collectively puts the work in.
(Another incredibly useful article that I’d recommend you read: How to make a woman fall in love with you).
Sit down with your partner and tell her your new realization. That will help you shade more light on what the problem might have been. You’ll be in a better position to make things lively again when you’ve pinpointed where the disconnect was.
8. Work on your physical intimacy.
Physical intimacy triggers the production of oxytocin in your brain. A chemical that’s responsible for boosting feelings of trust, devotion, and facilitates bonding.
It’s a no-brainer that physical intimacy between couples is susceptible to becoming a routine. When your physical intimacy becomes an order of the day, it loses the crucial passion that facilitates the production of oxytocin.
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Also, when you feel that you need to fall in love again, chances are it’s been a while since you’ve shown each other gestures of affection.
Rekindling your sex life and how you show affection to each other can facilitate finding your way back to love.
9. Support individual interest.
The initial stages of a relationship are glorious and exciting because you get a chance to explore the other person. But as the relationship progresses, you tend to compromise and sacrifice bits of yourself to maintain harmony, the same is also true for your partner.
However, sometimes the things we give up might stir a resentment that might cause a disconnect in the long run. Supporting your partner’s individual interests can inspire them to explore more of themselves.
(Do you want to find out how to make her chase you? If so, you need to read this: How to make her chase you in a relationship).
Healthy and strong relationships are founded on more than love. You need partnership, trust, and gratitude from your partner to maintain the vigor in your relationship. Supporting them to be who they’ve always wanted to be, we’ll make your partner grateful and trust you more with her dreams, ambitions, and interest.
As you support your partner’s individual interests, you expand the things that you have in common. That can help you fall back in love as you rediscover the value of each other in the relationship.
10. Take a trip together.
Spending time apart can be a good wake-up call as to why you fell in love. Nevertheless, spending more time together can rebuild the broken bonds in a relationship.
It’s not easy with busy schedules and daily life distractions to notice if you are neglecting your partner in the relationship. After all, you get to spend time together every evening.
Taking a trip together eliminates the daily distractions and creates quality time. Visiting new places together can make everything around you feel new, even your partner.
You’ll get to discover bits of yourself and your partner that you never thought about. Your girl might see you in a new light which is very instrumental when trying to fall back in love.
Falling back in love might not be easy depending on how much you’ve drifted. But relearning your partner’s love language and being creative with it can help you wow her.
Also, when you are finding ways of how to fall back in love, don’t make your partner the sole goal. Consider what you want that will make you comfortable and happy in the relationship. If you make it all about your partner, you’ll burn out and after a certain period, you’ll be back on the drawing board to find ways again to fall in love.
Do you want to drastically improve your dating life?
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Emre is author, dating coach and CEO founder of Kamalifestyles. He has written books which sold thousands of copies over a decade. Emre trained and coached many clients from all over the world and men of all ages on how to improve their confidence, relationships and dating.
He has expertise in confidence, approach and attraction and has been featured in top newspapers and radios. He is passionate on helping his clients to achieve great outcomes and make sure they are not held back by the limitations.