One puzzle that all men have to face when they want to date is how to attract women. It’s a common analogy that women come from another planet and that it’s challenging to understand them.
However, women are not as complex as we’d want to think they are. The difference between men and women when it comes to dating is what motivates them. Men can be driven by lust and power to conquer, but women are a bit different.
Understanding what women desire from a guy can make you irresistible even to a difficult woman. Over the years as a dating coach, I’ve helped thousands of men master their art in the game of seduction and dating.
In this blog, we’ll look at simple ways of how to attract women and make them want you. Every woman has a romantic fairytale that deep down they want to be quenched. Seeing through her tests and games and understanding her desires can make you the guy she cannot turn down.
First, gentlemen, as much as money can make your life comfortable, using money to attract women will only bring in gold diggers. You can attract a woman without her knowing how much you earn or what luxury you can afford.
Second, your looks are not her number one incentive. You can look like the sexiest man on Earth and still get turned down. So, what really attracts women?
Let’s explore how to attract women and make them crave for you:
1. Shift of mindset
One thing that I tell all the men that I coach is your mindset is your biggest advantage when you want to attract a woman. Most men believe that when you make a woman feel extra special, she’ll be attracted to you.
The problem with that mindset is it puts guys in the defensive position. It’s a lot of work to defend and also impress a woman.
Women are attracted to the value they think a guy brings. Putting a woman on a pedestal to attract her can make you look desperate and lower your value.
(Not a better way to work on your mindset than by checking out our Supreme Confidence Course).
I’m not saying that you treat her like she doesn’t matter. Of course, a woman wants to be drawn where she feels safe and appreciated. But don’t make her the prize.
Take your time with a woman and let her understand what you are made of before you drop the big guns.
2. Inspire trust and comfort
The existing mistrust between men and women makes it challenging for men to attract the women they desire. Women are suspicious of the intention of all men that approach them.
When you approach a woman and start launching one punchline after another, it’s easy for the woman to conclude that you are only interested in having a bite of the cookie and disappear.
Building trust and comfort with a woman you want to attract will inspire the woman to give you a fair audience. She’ll listen to what you have to say without suspecting your motive.
(Here’s a great blog article with some insights on how to build trust with a woman: How to make a girl fall for you).
How to attract women
The easiest way to inspire trust and comfort with a woman you just met is to show them that you are genuinely interested in knowing them. She’ll become comfortable around you the more she talks about herself and she notices you are eager to know more. Trust develops from the comfort that the woman enjoys when around you.
3. Indulge her in a challenging conversation.
Have you ever seen a gorgeous lady with a guy you think is average-looking? We all have! Women find intelligent men to be very attractive.
Women are drawn to men because of the emotions they trigger in them. You can capture a woman’s mind and manipulate the emotions she experienced while with you by having an engaging conversation with her.
Mastering the art of conversation is crucial when it comes to attracting women. It allows you to build a persuasive and irresistible personality to the woman that appeals to her emotional side.
Take an example of a skilled salesperson. They can persuade you to buy something you don’t really need. But how they packaged their information made it difficult to bluntly say no.
4. Attract a woman with social proofing.
I understand that when you like a woman sometimes it becomes a challenge to bring your A-game. That’s normal because the stakes are high and you don’t want to fumble the ball and lose the woman you desire.
Social proofing is a sneaky way to attract the woman you desire without doing much. Women feel comfortable around guys that are surrounded by women even if they don’t know the guy.
(Here’s another awesome article for you with some general tips on getting her attracted to you: How to get a girl to like you).
When you are engaging beautiful women and they seem to be having, the woman you want to attract will notice you. Social proofing inspires curiosity and interest.
The woman you want to attract might even be a little jealous that you are not giving her attention. You’ll find it a landslide attracting a woman you’ve already captured her interest and curiosity.
5. Display your sense of humor.
You don’t have to be extra funny to attract the women you desire. But a good sense of humor can keep a woman’s attention hooked on you.
Getting a woman to laugh can subconsciously make her associate you with a good time. However, the advantage of having a good sense of humor is the power of balance that it gives you.
Most guys with a good sense of humor can navigate through emotionally intensive topics and balance them with a good laugh. That makes it easy to dive deeper and explore these emotions more to a point a woman feels well connected to you.
It’s also challenging to be politically correct with everything you say during a conversation. Your words might raise a red flag if the woman doesn’t agree with what you’ve said. That can make her withdraw and sever the attraction.
A good sense of humor makes it easy to overcome conversation blocks when you are not politically correct.
6. Show a woman your vulnerability.
Approaching women is not always about using logic, sometimes you let your emotional side be dominant. Most men think that showing a woman their vulnerability will be taken as a sign of weakness.
That could not be far from the truth. Showing your vulnerability shows the woman how in touch you are with your emotional side, which women find attractive in strong and confident men.
(I’d highly recommend you have a read of the following article: How to win a girl’s heart).
Displaying your vulnerability also gives the woman a chance to be the savior. A woman will see herself as the one to protect your vulnerable side which can be a strong bonding point.
7. Display a positive attitude.
The world is not all fair and roses and everyone knows that. However, constantly complaining about how things are not going well can make you a boring person to be around.
There’s nothing attractive about complaining. When you are highlighting the negative things that are happening around you, it makes a woman look at you in a negative light.
Women are attracted to where the fun is. Displaying a positive attitude can attract women to you. A positive attitude can make a woman overlook all the disadvantages and be with you because of the vibe you give.
For example, you are out on a picnic and it starts raining. When you complain about the rain, it kills the mood and you might lose momentum. But if you decide to play in the rain, it might take things to a whole new level.
8. Understand what a woman desires.
Women desire different things when it comes to dating. The best way to attract a woman and make her chase after you is to understand what she desires.
(It will also help you to escalate with her physically. Read this for more insight: How to get a girl to kiss you).
Family and kids are not always what women want. Making assumptions about what might impress a woman can only drive her further away if you’re wrong.
Engage a woman and listen to what she wants to gain in a relationship. You’ll be irresistible when you show her that you can give her what she craves in a relationship and more. Mastering conversation skills can make you persuasive when you probe a woman to open up about her desires.
If you’ve been reading my blogs, you’ll notice that I put more emphasis on the art of listening. A lot of people don’t listen and that’s why they don’t get what they desire.
Listening to a woman gives you all the hacks you’ll need to attract her. Most women speak more than men and that opens them up to you about where their mind is at.
You can tell what a woman likes and doesn’t like by having a conversation with her. You can even know her entire life’s plan.
Listening allows you to identify things that you have in common and you can use that to build attraction.
Furthermore, women are attracted to men that give them attention. A woman will know when you are listening which can make her appreciate your company more.
The more time you spend together and she likes it, the more attraction becomes inevitable.
Women are not searching for men that have everything figured out. But having a sense of direction and purpose can make you very attractive to a woman. So, as much as you are looking for ways of attracting women, working on yourself can make you the guy that every woman wants.
Be someone that you can be attracted to and you’ll see women being attracted to you without having to put much effort to impress them.
Do you want to drastically improve your dating life?
Reach out to me today if you’d like some highly effective 1-on-1 Dating Training: CONTACT US
Iain Myles is an internationally recognised dating coach and co-owner of the UK’s largest dating coaching company, Kamalifestyles. Iain is also an internet sensation thanks to the multiple viral videos posted through the YouTube channel KamaTV, which has grossed over 100 million views.
Iain has appeared in numerous newspaper columns and radio shows across the world. He is a regular contributor to BBC Radio in the UK.