Wouldn’t it have been easier when you would just walk up to a girl and ask her to be your girl like when you were in kindergarten? Well, we are here now, and most guys are clueless about how to game a girl through text girl out over text for the first time. It’s challenging to trigger an emotional connection that a face-to-face meeting would inspire through a text. Especially, if you have never met the girl, texting might feel like a slippery slope. Most guys will want to always have the right words at the right time. That’s a dangerous path because you might assume a persona that you feel a woman might like over text. Understanding how to engage and excite a girl through text is a skill that gives you superpowers in the dating coach for men world. In this blog, you’ll explore how to ask a girl out over text for the first time. You’ll understand how to finesse the texting barriers and get a woman hooked on you. 1. Initiate an engaging conversation A woman’s superpower and weakness in dating is her mind. The first approach of how to ask a girl out over text for the first time is to initiate an engaging conversation. A conversation that will ultimately inspire her to put you in her imagination holding hands. However, you first have to gauge the interest of the woman you want to ask out for a date. A conversation that is one-sided or one-word answers will make it difficult for you to build any form of emotional connection. (A great article on how to make friends with the opposite sex: How to make female friends). Building an engaging conversation draws the woman closer to you because she also gets invested in the conversation. A woman will let her guard down when she’s having a thrilling conversation. That will allow you to connect with her and gauge her interest or form one. Compliments are a great way to start a conversation. It subtly gives away your intention without making you vulnerable. Dig from the archives something that would create an impact you desire if your compliment revolves around it. 2. Understand what she likes. One of the sneakiest ways of asking a girl out over text for the first time is understanding what she likes. However, the challenge that most guys have is finding something a girl likes that they can use to get the girl out on a date. Asking a woman what her hobbies are and asking her out based on them is not sleek. A woman might turn you down because there was no ‘wow’ effect. The ‘wow’ effect comes when you show a woman you know something personal about her that she didn’t think you’d know. (A great article on How to tell if she is avoiding you: How to tell if a girl is avoiding you). You can know what a woman likes by how frequently she talks about it. The energy and enthusiasm of a woman when she’s talking about something can tell you if they like it.
Text for the first timeYou: I have two tickets for the Lakers game. Would you mind joining me? (If she’s a Lakers fan or a basketball fan, her excitement for the game will inspire an easy yes.) One thing that women love more than their pets is a guy who can listen. A woman would be impressed that you knew something about her without having to directly ask. It sends the impression that you pay attention to her and that can inspire a woman to want to go out with you. 3. Win her trust and comfort How to ask a girl out over text for the first time can be nerve-wracking because you don’t know how the girl will respond. But what if you knew what a woman would say, would you be bold enough to ask? Well, a strong emotional connection can inspire a woman to say yes. Building trust and comfort with a woman over text can improve the bond you share. (Another incredible article for you to read: What to do when your girlfriend ignores you). When a woman trusts you, she’ll be open to sharing more intimate things about her with you. She’ll have flexible boundaries with you and you can use that to build a more intimate relationship through text. Showing a woman your genuine vulnerability can inspire her to slowly open up. The more she opens up the more your trust and comfort will be developing. 4. Pose a challenge The dating world favors guys that are creative with their approach to women. Texting doesn’t have the intensity that face-to-face has when asking a girl out. A woman might get cold feet when you directly ask her out via text. The first meeting doesn’t have to be an actual date with roses and champagne on ice. Downplaying the stakes can make it easier for a woman to say yes. Posing a challenge is a casual way of asking a woman out without the pressure that comes with going on a date. Understand what she’s into and challenge her on it. For instance, if she’s into fitness you can challenge her for a training session together. Most athletic women are competitive. She’ll show up in her sports gear, and you’ll have your shot to ask her for a proper date in person. 5. Ask for her help You have a good chance to see the woman you’ve only texted if the first-time meeting doesn’t revolve around romance. Most women believe that guys are only interested in the cookie. You have to be calculating how you bring her closer. However, that’s not to say that you hide your intentions. You can still show the girl your interest but also show her that you want to know her as a person. (Learn how to draw in her attention and interest: How to get a womans attention). Asking for help is a good way to ask a girl out over text for the first time. It shows that you value a particular set of skills in her. Most women are attracted to men that appreciate their intelligence and skills. Before asking for help, you have to consider if it’s something she’ll enjoy coming to do. If she loves charity, you can ask her to come and help you out in something you are volunteering in. You’ll bond over shared interest which can guarantee you a good start towards an actual romantic date. 6. Go for an adventure Another sneaky way of how to ask a girl out over text for the first time is to offer her a taste of adrenaline. Most people have a daring side that they rarely explore. Some women are attracted to ‘bad boys’ because they inspire the daring side. Even women that might not seem adventurous have something that will make their adrenaline pump hard. The trick is to know what it is and offer it on a silver platter. (I’d highly recommend you read this: How to move on from a toxic relationship). It’s easy for people to have a deep connection when the adrenaline is high. Taking her out on an adventure has less pressure and screams of fans. It will make it easy for you to ask and easy for her to give you an answer you’ll smile about. 7. Know how to display your intentions The mistrust between men and women makes gaming women over text challenging. However, you can easily ask a girl out over text when she knows your intentions. The mistake that most guys make is approaching women pretending to want friendship then as the relationship starts they switch it. It’s a move that triggers doubt and gives the woman the idea that you only want to hit it. Show her your desire and interest in her. However, when you ask her out, don’t make it about your desire to have a romantic relationship with her. Show her that you want to understand her more. A woman will find it easy to come if she knows it’s a chance to get to know each other. When you are showing genuine interest, it might also make the woman curious about you. Understanding how to display your intentions clears doubts that might give the woman last-minute withdrawal. She’ll feel safe going out with you. 8. Understand how to read the signs The last and crucial skill to have when contemplating how to ask a girl out over text for the first time is knowing how to read signs of interest and lack of interest. It’s easy to ask a girl out once you feel there is a connection that might inspire her decision. (Do you want to know how to approach a cold? Read this: How to approach a girl). Understanding how to read signs of interest can make your timing impeccable when you ask the girl out. Also, you’ll be able to tell a girl that’s not into you. Sometimes guys put so much effort to impress a girl that they will eventually reject any escalation. You’ll know which battles to fight and which to let go of when you’ve mastered how to tell signs of interest through text. Final Take Making the first meeting playful and fun is an easy way to get a woman to say yes to going out with you. Women are different, and how your interaction started and diverse personalities can make it challenging if you have rigid techniques of approaching women. The trick is in understanding the woman you are texting. When you ask the right questions, you’ll know where to throw your bait. Finally, build your conversation skills. Most guys that have mastered the art of conversation find it easy to connect with women even via text. Do you want to drastically improve your dating life? Reach out to me today if you’d like some highly effective 1-on-1 Dating Training: CONTACT US
Emre is author, dating coach and CEO founder of Kamalifestyles. He has written books which sold thousands of copies over a decade. Emre trained and coached many clients from all over the world and men of all ages on how to improve their confidence, relationships and dating.
He has expertise in confidence, approach and attraction and has been featured in top newspapers and radios. He is passionate on helping his clients to achieve great outcomes and make sure they are not held back by the limitations.