Blog, Featured, The Myles Show

Good looking and can’t get a girlfriend!

How to stop thinking about girls

Okay, let me start by saying that looks are not the be- all and end- all in getting a girlfriend! I feel like you need to raise your awareness, get out of your head and start seeing things for what they are. First of all, we live in an era where people, and especially men, have learned how to groom themselves.

By that virtue, practically every man is good looking today. Whilst I’m not disputing that you’re good looking, I just seek to understand why you think that your looks should set you apart from other men and get you a girlfriend, instantly.

Get a girlfriend!

The second question I want you to ask yourself – by whose standards do you think you’re good looking. Well, let me just say that, you’re good looking by your own standards, like everyone else. Which means that by us believing that we’re good looking is our truth, which no one can dispute because it is our truth. That, however, doesn’t mean that our reality should be everyone else’s truth.

A woman doesn’t necessarily have to perceive you as good looking because of, one, that is not her truth, and two, she has her standards of “good looking” that are not necessarily in line with yours. For all you know, you could be average to her. This is why beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder.

Remember, getting a girlfriend is less about you wanting yourself and more about a woman wanting you. It’s her mark of beauty that counts here and not yours. So you could be good looking to yourself but not to the kind of women you’re trying to attract. That shouldn’t change the fact that you’re attractive, though, if you see what I mean.

You should also make yourself aware of the fact that we are living in a world where men know how to groom up and make themselves look attractive. It is, therefore, no longer something special. What is indeed unique is what you have to your appealing looks.

What other qualities do you have that set you apart from other good looking men? I mean, you can bet that you’re not the only man pursuing your crush. It is safe to assume that you’re amongst at least four other men looking for the attention of that one girl. So you cannot count on looks to set you apart, pal.

Also, no well put together woman will go for a guy just for looks. Well, unless she wants to put you on a pedestal, and use you for her selfish gains as opposed to loving you.

Iain Myles is an executive dating coach of Kamalifestyles. He specializes in coaching men who have been looking for dating success and chronically unlucky with women. He publishes regular infield dating videos and social experiments in KamaTV. He’s highly experienced in live training of our clients on streets, coffee shops, in bars and clubs.

Iain teaches the core principles of the approach that every guy needs to know to become successful in dating including confidence, conversational skills, connection and mind sets. He has been featured in top radios and newspapers in UK and Ireland.

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Iain Myles

Iain Myles is an internationally recognised dating coach and co-owner of the UK’s largest dating coaching company, Kamalifestyles. Iain is also an internet sensation thanks to the multiple viral videos posted through the YouTube channel KamaTV, which has grossed over 100 million views.

Iain has appeared in numerous newspaper columns and radio shows across the world. He is a regular contributor to BBC Radio in the UK.