You might have had one or more awful first dates that got you blocked, or worse, friend-zoned.
It’s okay because most of us have been there.
But after reading this blog, it will not be okay to have an awful first date because I will give you tips on how to hack the first date!
Most guys are usually nervous on the first dates, but only a few guys manage to overcome the anxiety and show the best in them.
Second dates are the time that most guys show what they are made off because you are comfortable with the girl.
This blog will take you through a series of tips that will make you stand out on the first date.
You are already a master because you secured a date with the woman you want. But how do you not screw a date with someone you don’t know?
When you play safe, the conversation will be artificial because you are afraid not to offend each other.
You’ll act like you are following a script to impress each other. But these ‘perfect’ dates don’t guarantee you a second date.
Here are first date tips that will impress a woman and get you a second date:
Build a strong first impression.
It’s not good to judge people on appearance but most of us can’t help it.
We try to judge people we don’t know to familiarize ourselves with them. That means that the impression you’ll make on your date is very crucial.
Most women distrust men and that’s why most of them will try and make a theory of you before knowing you.
But the problem with that is that if she has a bad first impression of you, everything that follows will be more difficult for you than it should be.
For example, “Communication is easy when you and your date have a sense of trust and comfort. But when she has a bad first impression, it means that you’ll be trying to justify yourself throughout the conversation which is a slippery place to be.”
The trick about creating a powerful first impression is the emotions that you trigger.
When you trigger desirable emotions, it becomes easy for you to connect with the woman.
Let’s take a look at some of the things you can do to build a strong first impression.
1. Dress to impress
Your appearance will say hi before even you do.
It might seem like a few seconds of interaction. But immediately a girl sees you and dismisses your dressing then you are starting the date from a disadvantage.
Your date will appreciate it if you are well dressed because she’ll feel that you made the effort for her.
Now, however, inspired effort does not matter. But as long as she thinks it’s her then you are on her good books already.
Since you don’t know what will impress the woman on the first date, keep it simple.
Go for clothes that will highlight your masculinity and fit well. Let your dressing show a part of your personality that you’d like the woman to know.
2. Confident body language
Our nonverbal cues give away a lot of information about us.
Sometimes we give off a negative vibe with our body language without realizing it.
A weak body language can trigger doubt and mistrust in a woman.
For example, It will be hard for a woman to know your intentions when you keep avoiding eye contact during conversation. It might be because you are shy but the woman might think you are hiding something and that will put her on defense.
A strong body language can increase your sex appeal because confidence illuminates your masculinity.
When you are walking towards your date, maintain an upright posture, and reduce hand movements.
Give a firm handshake with a light smile to make your confidence appear natural.
During the first minutes of your new date, a woman might be oddly silent and you’ll be doing most of the talking.
Read her body language to access her level of trust and comfort. If you notice that she’s not comfortable, you can mimic her body language to appeal to her subconscious.
3. Give a genuine compliment
You can build a strong first impression with a woman by giving her a genuine compliment.
It starts your interaction from a positive side because of the nonverbal cues that compliments have.
Women like men that can shower them with attention. Complimenting her shows that you recognize her efforts.
It shows that you are impressed which can communicate interest. Most guys don’t get second dates because the girl is uncertain about their interest.
Complimenting her removes her mind from the limbo and gives you a chance to build on something solid.
Another subtle way of building a strong first impression is arriving on your date earlier than your date.
It communicates your priorities and a woman likes to know that she’ll be top of your priorities.
Build an engaging conversation.
The rule of thumb is: first dates have to be short.
To get a second date, you want the woman to feel a gap when she’s leaving after the date that only you can fill.
Making the first date short and sweet can create a crucial sense of mystery that can hook your date to you.
However, conversation builds the bridge that will put you in the same emotional and mental space for a strong connection.
Most men with a high success rate with women are good storytellers.
We use the stories we tell to explore a woman’s interests, strengths, vulnerabilities, and shared aspects.
But women don’t automatically open up on the first date and it will be challenging for you to get a second date if you don’t understand the woman.
Let’s explore ways that you can build an interesting conversation and get her attached to you.
1. Inspire trust and comfort.
A woman will be more than willing to go on a second date with a guy that she trusts and feels comfortable around.
Showing your date your vulnerability can give you an advantage as she might reciprocate which will offer a chance to connect.
The trick is never what you say is how you say it.
You can show her your vulnerability and she still ditches you because she thinks that’s your pick-up move.
When a woman feels she’s part of your statistics, she switches off.
Being clear about your intention can inspire trust and comfort because the woman will understand what you want from her.
Most guys want to take things slow before they reveal their intention which is usually a mistake.
The longer you wait to tell her what you want, the more time she has to come up with misinformed reasons for what you want.
2. Inspire the emotions you want.
It’s easy for people who laugh or cry together to connect on a deeper level because of the shared emotional space.
What gets you the second date is the feelings that you trigger when the girl thinks about you.
You can use conversation to inspire emotions you desire to connect with. However, it takes a higher understanding of your date to know which emotion makes her most vulnerable.
Even desirable emotions make women vulnerable because it lowers their guard.
However, you want to be careful not to make your first date a therapy session.
When you explore undesirable emotions for a long time (which is time you don’t have), it will make the overall mood somber.
Explore her emotions by introducing new topics and use conversation techniques such as humor to balance the emotions explored.
3. Listen to understand.
Listening is the most crucial part of a conversation.
Most people just wait for their turn to speak.
That will cost you on your first date because you’ll miss the emotions behind the words.
It’s important to understand the emotions behind the words because they show you what matters.
On your first date, the primary goal if you want a second date is to figure out what the woman wants.
What does she want in her man? What’s her ideal relationship? What turns her off and on?
You’ll know which buttons to push when you understand what she needs. I always say that it’s easy to get what you want from a woman if you can find a way to blend it with what she wants.
Listening can also be your secret weapon to make you interesting on the first date because you’ll not run out of things to say.
You’ll know which topics excite the girl and how to use them to your advantage. For example:
Her: I love traveling and experiencing a new place.
You: Tell me which city you are in love with. (You are introducing an emotion by exploring her desirable memory.)
Her: Rome does it for me always.
You: I wish I could explore it with you someday. (You are playing with the possibility of having a future that can trigger the woman to imagine how it would be.)
4. Structure the conversation to be two-way.
You are not on the date alone and so you should not experience the burden of building an interesting conversation alone.
Most men talk too much on the first date to impress the girl with their achievements and strengths.
It will be challenging to get a second date if you talk too much because you’ll miss the crucial buttons you need to press.
You’ll also give the woman too much information that she’ll have nothing to look forward to.
Structure the conversation in a way that she works for her meal. Usually, most girls are silent at the beginning of the conversation, but engaging her from the start allows her to give you hooks that can be used to explore her more.
5. Create mystery.
I enjoy playing poker because of the mystery that fills the table.
The adrenaline becomes so much that you can smell it.
Dating is like that.
Women like where there’s something more to find out about a guy.
On the first date, allow the woman to know the person you are, and what you aspire to be.
That makes you familiar with her which is important to build trust and comfort. But the catch is to give her your stories as bait.
Creating mystery on the first date hooks the woman’s interest to you and that’s what gets you the second date.
When the woman is curious about you, she’ll put her guard up because she hasn’t figured you out.
But she’ll also bring her guard down because she wants to explore you.
It’s much easier for you to get a second date once a woman feels there’s more to you.
6. Build sexual tension.
Building sexual tension can be challenging on the first date because you don’t know what makes the girl tick.
But it’s a sure way to get yourself a second date.
It escalates the conversation from small talk to a progressive conversation.
Sexual innuendos are a sneaky way to build sexual tension without going fully in. It allows you to test the water, and in case things are not ready yet, you have plausible deniability.
That way you can test different areas to know what makes her steaming hot.
Another fool-proof technique to build sexual tension in a conversation is using nonverbal cues.
When you see a woman biting her side lip suggestively, it becomes a challenge not to think about her sexually.
Men also have nonverbal and body language that illuminates their masculinity and take the woman’s mind for a fantasy trip.
Learn how to use nonverbal cues to build sexual tension because you can never go wrong.
Smart exit strategy
One of the most burning questions that guys wonder about is what do you do after the first date is over.
Do you hug her goodbye? Or do you give her a handshake and wait for the next time?
The assumption that most guys make towards the end of the date that harms their chances of getting a second one is thinking the girl is the prize.
Placing the girl on a pedestal can take away your leverage as it might make you seem desperate.
An exit strategy that will guarantee you a second date lies in your timing.
When you leave the date too early, it might show a lack of interest. But when you stay too long, you might eliminate the aspect of curiosity.
Allow the date to end when you feel that you understand her and she has developed a strong interest in you.
When you leave while things are still hot, she’ll want to know how things go. But when you end the date because you’ve run out of things to say, there’ll be nothing to look forward to.
Be a gentleman and offer to foot the bill at the end of the date. Yes, they are strong and independent women, but you want to be the lead in your encounter.
It shows that you are well planned and you know what you want.
Women are attracted to men that seem to have everything in control.
But if she offers to split the bill, don’t refuse. It shows that she wants to carry her weight and you accepting that shows that her opinion and decisions matter to you.
How you make the woman feel during and after the date is what will get you a second date.
Do you want to learn how to build a conversation on your first date?
Learning how to decode a woman’s body language and nonverbal cues can keep you on the right track in a conversation with any woman.
Kamalifestyles offers a wide array of products that can help you explore female dating psychology and how to structure conversations with women.
You can make all your first dates successful by exploring our website and looking at what works for you.
We have tailored all our programs and materials to fit different personalities so that you don’t lose your IT when advancing your skills.
Read More: How to make her chase you in a relationship